Three Ways to Reconnect, Despite the Stress

When I’m stressed, I hoard my emotional resources. The pain prevents my sharing.

A rose bush in the snow

A recent bout of stress showed me its most damaging results—stress keeps me from nurturing. I feel detached. I don’t reach out. I wonder. . . Do I do this? Is it intentional? Do the circumstances bring it on? Is this my own protection from the pain and stress? When I felt my return to a position of peace, I made three discoveries:

First: Ideally, stress seems to be an automatic reaction to negative circumstances. I wish I did not take it on, but I unconsciously do.  I discovered peace returns quicker if I consciously seek the same soft reactions to my own circumstances and weaknesses that I would give to other people.

Second: During times of stress I wrap the immediate issues together with the long term ones and feel bleak about any resolution. I discovered that by taking care of immediate needs first allows me to set my stress aside and take the pressure of the negative off my day-to-day activities.

Third: I want to remain attached to other people in opportunities to nurture and be nurtured, but I close off.  While I continue to mechanically assist and serve others, I don’t give my best nurturing under stress. I discovered physical touch—even the lightest expression of love—brings back sincerity to my nurturing.

This post is an answer to My Daily Question:
Have I Seen the Hand of God Reaching Out to Touch Us Today?


  1. This is really perceptive, and helps me understand a lot about myself. Thanks, as always, for sharing your thought process and day-to-day revelations.

  2. Camille
    Mar 3, 2009

    I see this in myself too, especially how I am with my children. When all four seem to need me at once and are hollering their demands the nurturing, calm teacher in me that I want to be so badly does not come out. Instead I stress, I feel crazy, and all I can do is deal with the most important demand and need of the moment. In discipline issues I tend to be a lot like you talked about in your second observation, seeing a bleak resolution. But I must admit when I look at things in hindsight specific things are improving bit by bit, as we have done the best we can and know how to do, with a lot of creativity and prayer.

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